The man who was happy because I could hear him

This morning I received my new ears.

That sounds more dramatic than it was. Sieds placed two surprisingly small Phonak Naída hearing aids behind my ears, clicked a few things on his computer and then looked at me like a man who had personally just invented hearing.

I had expected larger devices. They are called Super Power, after all. That makes you expect something requiring at least a trailer and an industrial power socket. Yet they are even smaller than my old Oticon Xceeds.

And comfortable.

Suspiciously comfortable, even.

Then came the speech test. Good too. There may still be a little improvement possible in the soft high tones, but otherwise I understood him perfectly. That is useful with an audiologist; otherwise the conversation remains rather one-sided.

Then the volume went up.

A little further.

Further still.

No whistling.

Sieds became visibly happy. So did I. Apparently the earmoulds seal so well that there is room across almost the entire volume range before the whole thing decides to behave like a canary.

We tried Bluetooth. Fine. Telephone straight into my ears. Fine too.

Then I discovered that the Phonak app allows me to adjust the equaliser myself.

I did not touch it.

Look, that is what you call life experience.

The check-up is in four weeks. Until then they must prove themselves among people, machines, dogs, music, wind and everything else the world considers necessary for making noise.

As I left, Sieds also pressed a box of Rayovac batteries into my hands.

New ears, excellent speech, no feedback, good Bluetooth and a box of batteries thrown in.

I still do not know who looked happier this morning.

Sieds or me. 😄